Hearing: Moonspell

Jesse and I have opted for a new decision on our relationship. We said we'll just be friends so we don't have to add more pressure to our already stressful lives. One less thing to worry about right?

Well it turns out that being this way has stirred up a lot in us. Things are good, actually they're better than good, they're fucking fantastic.

Maybe it's just the moon, the autumn feelings in the air, whatever it is, he is everything I want right now, with no expectations as a girlfriend, it just is this way with him. He is beautiful and I feel drunk on it when he looks at me with his gorgeous green eyes. I've said it so many times, how I was drawn to his eyes from the first time I seen him. I could watch him blink all day because he's angelic when his eyes are closed. I tell him all the time.

But it's those eyes. I cannot help it. There is so much emotion there, some people just have that, it radiates off everyone around them, so easy to tell what they feel in a simple glance.

A part of me needs him for other reasons though. I feel the need to be close to someone physically. Sometimes I just crave the warmth of another person. Sometimes I think that I am too cold, or maybe I just try to be to independant emotionally. I don't want to be codependant because I was at one time in my life and it almost ruined me.

Maybe it's still an issue, seeing as I prefere not to be in relationships, but I see it as a good thing because it gives me more time for myself.

Anyway, I'm going to go. Ignore any errors.