CURRENT | PREVIOUS | ARCHIVES | PROFILE | WEBSITE | GUESTS | NOTES | E-MAIL | DIARYLAND


Wherever Forever Is
12:05 p.m. Jun. 22, 2003
The current mood of burntautumn@accesscomm.ca at www.imood.com


Hearing: Deadboy and the Elephantmen

Everyone is gone today, except me and my Gian, my little cutie. My son is the cutest. He is a little taurus just like me, and he's so quiet, cuddly and in his own little dream world all the time.

I woke up to a full house this morning. I slept till 10:30am and heard people everywhere. Jesse was already up but no where in sight. My aunt, cousins, grandmother and mom were all here. My sister and Kai were making breakfast, so I guess that's why everyone was here.

I went to bed with a killer headache. I was drinking this yummy red wine with Jesse last night. I didn't even have alot because of my ulcer. It started hurting on the first glass so I was forced to stop. We sat outside staring out at the darkness and looking up at the beautiful night sky. We talked about so many things. We talked until the birds started singing and the sky was a shade lighter. We decided that it was time to head to bed.

Earlier when we were on our way out to choose a bottle of wine, we were driving around and talking about this whole marriage deal. I had to explain to him how afraid it makes me to get married and he said he knew that I wasn't a marriage type person and we should just call it off, again, and he'll wait until i'm ready. I feel so bad for doing this to him every year.

I asked him if I could still take his last name, then I started wondering if I should just get married and change it that way. I talked to my mom about it last night. I told her i'm not into marriage at all, but I'll do it for a name change. I want to take her maiden name, and she said I should. I'm just not sure. I guess i'll be doing a lot of numerology this week trying to figure the best name that suites me since I'm going to legally change my first name as well. I want to change my first name because I hate my birth name, I want to change the last name for very important reason and it's such a long story that I won't go into it.

Anyway, I had a long talk with Jesse about my book because I trust his judgement. He is a bookworm as much as I am and he knows his shit. He loves what I have written so far and is really pushing me to complete this. We talked so long about my ideas and about this crazy world that I dreamt up. He even gave me a few ideas. I am going to complete this story before I get back to finishing the other ones just because this one is going to all come out at a faster pace, it needs to come out.

As soon as my son is down for his nap I am going to be back to work. Anyway, it's time to put the cutie down and get to work.



I am living in a world that is asleep - Jul. 17, 2007
- - May. 07, 2006
Small update, very small. - Nov. 21, 2005
Hurry up and eat some of this - Aug. 31, 2005
- - Aug. 18, 2005