Agents of Oblivion - Endsmouth(no, I didn't find the CD yet, I downloaded this song for a quick fix)

Okay so today was super busy. I painted my little heart out and read the 1/3 left of my book today. Good book I must say, I read some of it before bed last night and I was so excited, I practically screamed. I could not calm myself down, I was so happy, so inspired. I woke Jesse and told him to make me fall asleep, and he did a great job at doing so.

I finished a painting tonight, it took quite a while, it was the large one that I started a year ago, but I did it and I am now left with a sore body from such intense concentration. I also had time to start another one, a fantasy piece with lots of celtic designs. I'm sure the drawing part of it will be the only hard part, I've been drawing that picture for a few weeks now until I finally perfected the last small detials this evening, so I began painting the backround.

My paintings are building up. I will have to start selling some of them soon, because I have no where to put them. I really need some new canvas, that piece I started is my last one. I am down to nothing now and I'm on a roll with this right now, even more so than with my writing. My mad scientist mode again. I love it.

I have not been getting much sleep lately. I felt the effects of it today when I had aching eyes and a massive headache. I wanted to lay down and die in my bed. I tried, but it didn't happen. I should be in bed now, but I feel I must drink a full glass of water before bed, so that's what i'm working at at this very moment.

I have to buy some frames this weekend, black feathers for my wings, and some fabric for my dresses I want to make.

I have to get this Dax Riggs obsession out of my head. I've always loved him since Acid bath, then Agents came out and I realized what a genius he is. His voice is perfect and so intoxicating. Around two years ago, my obsession grew and it's worse now. I need more songs, more lyrics and more of his beautiful vocals. I wish I could just fly to New Orleans when I finish my black feathered angel wings and hear him play music, live. I would be so happy. The music is my inpiration, my muse.

I love Tori Amos almost as much. The only two artists that I could not live without.

Anyway, it's Gian's appointment tomorrow. I'm scared, when I think about it, I feel sick to my stomack. I was sitting on my bed kissing his little face and watching him laugh and smile at me everytime I did that. He is so happy, it makes me heart burst with happiness to see him like this all the time. I love him so much. I sometimes wish I could just take whatever is wrong with him away forever, if only I had the power to do so.